You Have Mail...

Dear Dysfunctional,
mail is perhaps the most awesome thing in the world, providing, of course, that it is not a sad collection of bills and some practically useless coupons enticing you to indulge in a purchase that not only have you never really bought, but never in the least wanted it either. Shredder fodder aside, mail is perhaps one of the best pick-me-ups available. To get something, anything, is an obvious message that you are actually part of society and have not been forgotten. To open up and see a card is an awesome feeling that you are alive and somebody took time to say hi. To open up an invitation makes you feel like finally you have something to look forward to. To open up a package is to feel the exhilaration of discovery mixed with just enough greed to make it enjoyable. But the crowning glory is to open up a three page letter. This tells you that there is somebody out there who also has nothing better to do, and who when they have nothing better to do, thinks of you. It is a huge self worth booster. I mean, I'm surprised that therapists havent picked up on this yet; mail therapy, a revolutionary new treatment which has been proven to cure depression. Unless, of course, its all a big conspiracy, where the doctors just want you to become dependent on their sessions until you end up a permanent customer. To return to the subject, however, the moral of the story is... send me mail, I love getting mail.
Thanks,
Dean Pincklemore

PS, song of the day is Junk of the Heart, by The Kooks